She loved order. She loved plans. She loved it when life worked out as planned. She loved control. She loved predictability, stability and reliability. The part she missed appending was "most of the time". This was what her life had come to become. That's not how she envisaged it or how she desired it to be. Okay, maybe it was.
But every girl deserves a huge surprise - something earth-shattering, breath-taking, ground-breaking - every once in a while. People around her felt the need to run most plans/decisions by her. She could not recollect the last time her jaw dropped (or) her eyes popped out (or) her heart melted. She couldn't remember the last time something unplanned yet extravagant came her way. It was like every decision from what clothes to wear, to what to cook for dinner, to what the likely vacation schedule looks like, to what life would be like a year from now was already planned and organized (of course, there was destiny that turned things around and made life interesting). Maybe that was a good thing. How many people could say that they were in the loop on everything that happened to them and around them ? Maybe she was just being ungrateful.
Everyone including her Dad would inform her of every plan they made for her and without her. He often said "I like to know that you approve". This quest for approval and opinion had often killed the element of surprise. When she watched movies where the girl got a huge flower bouquet delivered at her doorstep(or) the guy proposed in the middle of a crowded street (or) the husband turned out to be a millionaire's son or even trivial things like parents pay a surprise visit (or) the fiance` books two tickets on a plane to Timbaktu....she'd wonder why such moments never happened to her? Would she have liked it ? Every once in a while- yes!
The little surprises she vaguely remembers were from her college days. Heather would buy her gifts she didn't plan or approve of, take her on bike trips with no destination in mind and plan birthday parties and sleep-overs without her knowledge. Memories that would haunt her for a very long time. Heather was the only person that didn't seem to mind taking decisions for her and about her as long as it meant she'd have a great time. She missed Heather's spontaneity and audacity. She missed her best friend now more than ever.
Maybe she was looking at material life and tangible surprises, after all. To be honest, life did surprise her in a happy yet intangible sort of way and many times over. Maybe that was enough. Maybe it wasn't......Well, she did surprise herself every once in a while by being unable to make up her mind. Thank God all was not perfect in her "oh-so-perfect" world.
No comments:
Post a Comment